Friday, August 30, 2013

Fourth Wave Coffee Shop Opens

(Portland, Oregon USA) A new coffee shop opens today in Southeast Portland billing itself as the first Fourth Wave coffee shop in the world, pioneering a new model in retail coffee. The new store, called The Cupping Room, attempts to recreate the environment of a cupping contest by offering coffee only in sample form. Customers are allowed to purchase a cupping spoon and slurp and spit a variety of seasonal coffees. "Most third wave coffee shops pride themselves in their limited offerings, the best refusing cream and sugar," Elliot Frenton, The Cupping Rooms manager said. "We wanted to take it to the next level and offer our coffees as they are supposed to be experience, on the cupping table." Elliot went on to explain, "Great coffee shouldn't be consumed, it should only be tasted."

The new model represents a culmination of efforts by industry professionals who, for a long time, looked down on the consuming pubic. "Customers don't really know how to properly enjoy coffee," one expert explained. "Its up to us to educate them."

The new store will feature an array of coffee samples from around the world, emphasizing natural processed coffees in micro-lots of 1 bag or less. Customers are provided spit cups and those who choose to swallow their samples will be held in contempt and ridiculed just as soon as they leave the store. The store will also feature music from reel to reel tapes since vinyl is so over.

10 comments:

Poha said...

Is this a great country or what! Love you, Mark!

Paul said...

Please don't take my cream away, pleeeeeease

Glan Deas said...

Hello Friend!! I am a coffee lover. I drink thrice cup of coffee per day. Coffee is the reason of my fitness.


Reagrds,
Kopi Luwak

Robert Hunt said...

What is truly sad, is that I read the first couple sentences as if this were an actual thing. I mean, Portland . . . Thank you Mark for being such a likable asshole! :)

spencer shawn said...
This comment has been removed by a blog administrator.
Pete Leonard said...

Well written, entertaining, witty and thought provoking. What more could you want in a post?

I think "Specialty Coffee" and many of the hipster populated 3rd wave shops have made themselves unapproachable by the 'commoner'. I hope that whenever 4th wave is defined, it's far from The Coffee Heretic's portrait he just painted!

Coffeevines said...

Well that attitude towards coffee consumers is precisely why so many decide to use <a href="https://www.coffeevines.com'> coffee pods </a> these days. They don't need snarky remarks like "They don't know how to properly enjoy coffee."

Superdaveo said...

I was going to open a 5th wave coffee shop where you are only allowed 1 second of aroma, but hat seemed like to much. Do we really deserve to smell these works of art? So skipping 5 and moving on to 6. Customers will be able to look upon freshly roasted coffe that has been vacuumed sealed in a crystal cube. A glance will be offered for $25 for 6 seconds. I am toying with skipping 6 and going straight on to 7th wave where customers will be allowed 1 minute in total darkness on the other side of a brick wall from micro lots of freshly roasted coffee. Prices are to be determined.

Coffeevines said...

There's a fourth wave now? What happened to third wave single cup coffee ?

Shawn Kirby said...

Ha ha! You got any stock tips? Your preternatural skills as a prophet may not be limited to the coffee industry.

Portland Roasting Coffee is set to debut its third local outpost next week, in a Central Eastside space next-door to its roasting facility. The coffee shop, dubbed the Cupping Room, will be Portland Roasting's first cafe outside the Oregon Convention Center and plans to offer pour-over coffee and espresso. The Cupping Room's on track for an opening "the first week of September." [EaterWire]

http://pdx.eater.com/tags/the-cupping-room